Overwhelm: When You’re Too Overwhelmed to Build Momentum

Overwhelm. Burnout. Exhaustion. The never-ending hamster wheel. The deep hole you cannot climb out of. The metaphors are as endless as the feelings. Overwhelm can feel, well, overwhelming. When you’re too overwhelmed, it is difficult to build momentum, let alone take the first step toward movement.

Overwhelm Can Feel Overwhelming.

I know that sounds ridiculously obvious, but unless you have been deeply buried in it, you may not understand how debilitating it can become. It feels like you are digging a ditch and trying to climb your way out—and sometimes—you just want to lie down in it. Or like a hamster running on that wheel, and you cannot jump off.

I get it. I hear it every day from clients. I have experienced it. If I am being completely honest, overwhelm can still pop up for me. What I have recognized is that I am responsible for my overwhelming feelings. Whether my expectations are too high for the project or I have put too much on my own plate, I know I can get off the wheel with a small step.

However, some people need help seeing that potential leap.

I recently spoke with a woman who wants to build her own business. She has the idea. She has the experience. She knows she can do it. But she is exhausted.

She has been laid off twice, endured one job rejection after another, and has reached the point where she no longer knows which direction to move in. She wants to create something of her own, but she cannot find the energy to build momentum—let alone take the first small step.

The longer we talked, the clearer it became that the business was not the real problem. She was buried in overwhelm.

Overwhelm Doesn’t Always Look Like Having Too Much to Do

We usually talk about overwhelm as if it is simply a very long to-do list. Too many appointments. Too many emails. Too many responsibilities competing for our attention.

But overwhelm can also come from carrying too much disappointment or unreasonable expectations.

One layoff can shake your confidence. A second can make you question everything you thought you knew about yourself and your career. Add repeated job rejections, financial pressure, exhaustion, low sales at the launch of a new business, and the uncertainty of what comes next, and every decision begins to feel heavier than it should.

You may know what you want to do, but you cannot seem to do it. You might question your ability, timing, or knowledge. Then the frustration begins.

• Why can’t I get myself moving?

• Why haven’t I started?

• What is wrong with me?

Meanwhile, each unanswered question, unfinished task, and unrealized idea gets added to the pile. You keep digging the hole deeper until you feel completely buried beneath everything you believe you should already have figured out.

It Is Difficult to Build a Dream When You Are Still Recovering

Starting a business requires energy. It requires creativity, decision-making, confidence, and the willingness to keep moving without knowing exactly how everything will work out.

These are hard to access when most of your energy is spent simply coping with what has already happened. And this is the part we often overlook.

We expect ourselves to move immediately from disappointment into determination. We believe we should be able to turn a layoff into an exciting opportunity, transform rejection into motivation, and use fear as fuel.

Sometimes we can. Sometimes we are simply tired.

That does not mean the dream is wrong. It does not mean we are incapable of creating it. It may mean we have not given ourselves enough space to acknowledge what it took out of us to arrive here. You cannot shame yourself into having more energy.

And repeatedly telling yourself that you should be doing more will not create momentum. It will only give you one more thing to feel badly about.

When Everything Feels Important, Nothing Feels Possible

Overwhelm has a way of putting every task on the same level. Choosing a business name feels as urgent as finding clients. Creating a website feels as important as developing the actual service. Social media, pricing, marketing, logos, networking, finances, and business plans all begin competing for attention at once.

Instead of seeing a series of manageable decisions, you see one enormous thing called “starting a business.” Of course, you do not know where to begin. There is no clear beginning when you are trying to hold the entire vision in your head at the same time. The answer is not always another checklist.

A checklist can help when you need organization. It is less helpful when you are already exhausted and now have twenty-seven additional things staring back at you.

Before creating a plan, you may need to create some space. Ask yourself the following.

• What is immediate?

• What can wait?

• What are you carrying because it matters to you, and what are you carrying because you believe you should be doing it?

• What is one decision that would make the next decision easier?

These questions are not designed to solve everything at once. They are meant to help you separate what is happening now from everything your overwhelmed mind is trying to solve at the same time.

Momentum Does Not Have to Begin with Productivity

When someone wants to build a business, we tend to measure progress by visible accomplishments.

• Did you create the website?

• Did you post on social media?

• Did you get a client?

• Did you make money?

But the first sign of momentum may be much quieter. It could be admitting that you are burned out. It may be giving yourself permission to stop applying for jobs for one afternoon.

It may be writing down your business idea without immediately turning it into a complete business plan. It may be talking to someone who can help you hear your own thoughts again.

The first step does not have to impress anyone. It only needs to be possible from where you are right now—not from where you think you should be.

You May Not Need More Motivation

We quickly assume that when someone isn’t moving forward, they lack motivation. Or, my least favorite term, they are procrastinating.

Wanting something and having the capacity to pursue it are not the same thing. You can desperately want a different life and still be too depleted to begin building it. You can believe in your business idea and still feel frightened by everything it will require. You can be intelligent, experienced, and capable while also being completely overwhelmed.

That is not a character flaw. Sometimes you do not need another motivational speech. You need a place to put down everything you have been carrying, look at it honestly, and decide what still belongs to you.

Then you can begin again—not with the pressure to build immediate momentum, but with enough clarity to see the next step.

And for now, the next step is enough.

Look Outside Before You Internalize the Overwhelm

On a final note, sometimes we must accept that we can’t control the job market or the economy, which can affect our job search and business sales.

Sometimes we aren’t examining the job report with thousands of other applicants vying for work, the AI application flood and how our resumes are read and spit out, and the inundation of ghost jobs appearing on platforms such as LinkedIn.

Research is a valuable tool while job searching.

Coffee With Ms. D

If this conversation resonates with you and you’ve been wishing for a space to challenge some of this in real time, I want to invite you to Coffee With Ms. D. It is a free monthly online gathering for anyone navigating change, reinvention, relationships, career transitions—and discovering what comes next.

No pressure. No perfect answers. Just real conversation, reflection, connection, and maybe one next step.

Grab your coffee and join me. Our next Coffee With Ms. D is on Friday, October 2, at 10 am, and it continues on the first Friday of every month.

You can register at CoachingWithMsD.com/coffee

I’d love to see you there.

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